THE.ARTISTIC.LIFE

2010-06-03T18:53:00.000-07:00

Indiana has Rockin Storms

I've been in Indiana since April 26th, and will be very sad to leave. I'm staying with my sister and her family. I love and admire them all so much, I can't believe I only have two weeks remaining. We have had SO much fun, though. Girls night, Columbus Idol, movie nights, frequent runs on a beautiful trail, taste of Cincinnati, jungle jims, camping, boat ride, hippie fair, wallpaper stripping, music videos, art projects, phenomenal storms, weekly trips to Bloomington, and more.

Rain is currently falling, while lightning flashes every few minutes. You wouldn't believe the lightning here-- it lights up the whole city. I'll have to come back every summer just for the storms.. and I guess because I love my family. Yeah. It's decided yet again. I really do love my sister and her family so much.

Now just waiting for a tornado before I head to the other side of the world . . .

2010-02-06T23:37:00.001-08:00

Superbowl Sunday!

I celebrate everything. And I love making festive meals and treats to suit the fun occassions. For this year's superbowl, I collected a few recipes from http://www.allrecipes.com/ and have already finished one-- "Gridiron Brownies" which are supposed to represent a football field w/ endzones. The slivered almonds are football players. I thought it was cute.. definitely not an advanced piece of work, but for a 21 year old, I'd give it a decent grade. Before the big game tomorrow, I'll be making stuffed tomatoes (favorite), crab dip (never made before), and football-shaped rice krispy treats (also never attempted.) Oh, how festively domestic. Happy superbowl, everyone!!

2009-12-27T10:22:00.000-08:00

Christmas

We've had a great Christmas, sort of weird how many friends of mine have a husband/wife & kids & are starting to do their own Christmas. Not me. (Yet.) The Lifferth's have been in Utah and we've had a GREAT time, I had missed them so much, and never want them to go back to Indiana! We've done several things so far, including jump-on-it, seeing "The Frog and the Princess" (I think that's what it's called), playing basketball, going to Chuck E. Cheese, and just hanging out. We'll be doing much more before they leave. Christmas eve and Christmas day have been pretty traditional, though we've added a couple things.. unfortunately, I can't remember what we've added. The following photos are the family (not including me, I took the pic), what we eat for breakfast on Christmas, my beautiful niece Gabby, handsome nephew Alex, and super cute nephew Oliver- "Ollie." I'll be putting more photos up on facebook, so look there for additional Christmas moments.

2009-12-27T09:42:00.001-08:00

Movies Galore

I've realized that I've been watching movies like mad, mostly thanks to redbox, which is saving me lots of money. I looked at my rental history online & thought I should put the titles here along with a simple "yes" I liked it or "no" I didn't like it. People always blog about movies, so why not..

Curious Case of Benjamin Button: No. Didn't finish this, got bored..
Management: No. Stupid movie, acting wasn't great, dumb plot.
X-Men Origins: Wolverine: Yes. Awesome.
Dance Flick: No. Why did I bother? Couldn't finish it, so lame.
Sunshine Cleaning: Yes. Good acting, good story.
The Hangover: Yes. Great movie. So funny.
I Love You, Man: Yes. Loved this movie! Saw it twice.
17 Again: No. Don't ask. Everyone said it was good-wasn't that great..
Confessions of a Shopoholic: No. Didn't like it so much.
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past: Yes. Decent movie.
Funny People: No. Retarded! I was disappointed.
Observe and Report: Yes. Pretty funny from what I remember.
Year One: No. So dumb, we couldn't finish it.
Land of the Lost: Yes. Actually kind of liked the movie. Kept my attention.

There you have it. I've recently seen other movies as well, but those are the redbox films over the last 90 days. I'll add more to this list accordingly..

Couple's Retreat: Yes. Way funny, but not everyone's kind of humor.
Hannah Montana: Yes. ha ha... watched w/ my niece and enjoyed it!
Almost Famous: Nah. Lame.. (older movie)
Bride Wars: Yeah. Cute. Esp the 2nd time-- watched with French audio.
The Proposal: Yes. Love this movie, seen it a few times.

2009-12-19T14:46:00.000-08:00

Family Photos
My friend Josh & his siblings/cousins

2009-12-07T00:00:00.001-08:00

Engagements Part II

2009-12-05T11:22:00.000-08:00

Engagements: Josh and Savannah

These two were fun to shoot-- they're getting married in March! Can't believe it. Though sadly with 500+ photos taken, I managed to ruin most of them-- way bothersome, since they would've been great photos (the joys of getting a new camera), but we're re-shooting in the next couple of days.

2009-07-08T17:41:00.001-07:00

Josh

2009-07-06T23:10:00.000-07:00

Adrian (few more of him soon)

2009-07-02T10:44:00.000-07:00

Spence (w/o photoshop edits)

I briefly edited a few of photos I took of him and am posting them in their "pre-edited" state. I have ~~four~~ eight shoots to do next week-- stoked about that. And within the next month they should look better quality than this using a high-tech program. What makes the last photo great is that this guy is 6'7".

*You can click on photos for a larger view.

2009-06-23T18:37:00.000-07:00

iLike Music Page Up!! (w/ track samples)

Check it out: http://www.ilike.com/artist/Jheules

[had to spell my name a really weird way since mine was taken... wish I would've used something else... oh well!]

And also one of those pages people can become a "fan" of:

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/pages/Jules/95538652249

(photos of course courtesy of Bridgett Jones.)

2009-06-12T11:44:00.000-07:00

HOLY CRAP HOLY CRAP HOLY CRAP !!!

My mom and I have been going to parade of homes, and ehh, it's been very fun, but nothing yet that has stood out and said BAM! So Julie!! (my taste isn't too typical.) But I have seen some awesome sinks, and I do love sinks that are awesome.

Now, this morning I woke up and had the urge to look up vessel bowl sinks online, and came across a website full of contemporary amazingness. I've just had 10 minutes of heaven looking at these sinks. When I look at this stuff, it is the only time I get anxious with the "Ah, I want that!" "I need that!" voices. And we all know one reason I've got to pursue music is so that Chinese man/custom contemporary furniture designer in Vegas will deck out my house for free. . .

Seriously, look at this stuff. Does this not make you drool with lust?

Now, I don't know how much bathtubs usually cost, but this one is $20,000:

2009-04-30T12:57:00.000-07:00

Importante. New Blog!

Since I'm a psych major and am passionate about the field, this new blog will benefit me a lot-- having a place to look back on to see what I was doing/researching/thinking about.

And the new blog's URL is: http://psychlounge.blogspot.com/

. . . brace yourselves.

2009-02-27T07:07:00.000-08:00

Art! Need to post some. I've made Sunday into my art day, so I've been doing photography every other Sunday. The following photo was taken on my cell phone, don't have my other photos on this computer. I like the look of construction in photos.. cool looking mess.

2009-02-16T00:27:00.000-08:00

Some New Findings

Sunflower Market: I don't know if I'll ever be able to shop for groceries (more especially produce), anywhere else. They carry such organic, fresh, inexpensive, and beautiful food! Some of the groceries can get pricy, but usually worth it. Go check it out, you may fall in love. The one in the Provo/Orem area is university pkwy, south of the mall, close to einstein's bagels.

2009-02-15T23:39:00.000-08:00

Valentines Day

So on Valentines I really wanted to go on a date with some awesome guy. But I didn't. Prob my fault for not showing clear signals with men.. working on it. ha. Anyway, valentines was spectacular, and probably more fun than if I had gone on a date. (With a man outside of my family, that is.) The evening consisted of:

Date #1: cooking/baking with mom. She made a heart-shaped chocolate cake (super cute) and chicken cordin bleu for half the family, while I made a vegan chocolate cake w/ coconut frosting and stuffed tomatoes for the other half.

By the way, this cake was awesome. Def one I'll make again in the future.

*I have posted the recipe on my recipe blog --> http://www.artliciousdish.blogspot.com/

Date #2: Getting a sugar-free dark chocolate bar from the boys in my family and eating it in front of them. Yum.

Date #3: Watching Dirty Rotten Scoundrels with everyone. I was in no mood to watch the movie about George W. Bush titled "W" (not the biggest fan of Bush) & was glad they went along with my suggestion. I think we all had a good time laughing together.

2009-02-07T09:28:00.000-08:00

Be Ready to be Inspired!

I'm subscribed to this amazing health-nut on youtube, who first got into health and nutrition to clear up her skin. I don't watch all of her videos, but she made one recommending a documentary called "Food Matters", which is supposed to have a similar effect as "The Secret." I watched the trailor and it's freaking brilliant, very well put together. Even if you're not a health-nut, I recommend viewing it. Something interesting to think about if nothing else.

It basically talks about the impact food has on our health and healing, and how "one quarter of what you eat keeps you alive and three quarters of what you eat keeps your doctor alive." And how food is the cure to things like cancer, depression, all these things we go to the doctor to get medication to take care of.

Take a second to watch the trailor, especially if you're into the whole organic, save the planet, eat raw food, type of thing.

TRAILOR CAN BE FOUND HERE --> http://foodmatters.tv/home

2009-01-24T11:00:00.000-08:00

The Problem of Evil

I have quite a lot I could say about "the problem of evil", but will give just a couple of points, as I see it. The problem of evil, for those who don't know what I'm talking about, is the logical problem of how a perfectly loving and omnipotent God can exist, yet there is evil in the world.

To me, one sort of "evil" is doing something with the intention of causing another's pain and suffering. The holocaust is one definite example. As my parents and I were discussing this, the point was brought up that those causing the suffering of others, even to death, thought they were doing a good and patriotic thing. They saw it as a duty to remove all "impurity" from Germany. The evil contained in that historical event was not limited to the killing of God's children, but in the way those conducting the work (also children of God), were viewing their own "power". They were claiming to know certain things without true conviction, and claiming one type of people to be better than another. The fact that they were able to put their brothers and sisters, these beautiful children of God, through that sort of pain and torture, is unthinkable. Is it not evil to view another person as "unclean" because of their race or religion? And then to put them through intense physical pain because of it? The thought that somebody could see that as true and good absolutely blows my mind.

Another evil, I believe, is the way such skewed beliefs are ingrained into people's minds at such a young age. This could branch out into several points, but I will limit the thought here. (I may have trouble putting this thought into writing, so bear with me.)

For one, different societies hold different things as priority, and apparently the natural man is drawn to particular "ways of life", usually for the sake of one's own self and/or to impress another. For instance: money/riches to buy useless things, makeup to heighten beauty, etc. I see it as so far from the truth to hold such beliefs as priority and to then pass those on, rather than to focus on what truth is and how beautiful and precious each soul is.

I see in my head the picture of several generations within society and within families. Along with these generations I see various thoughts that are passed on through both family and society, as well as heightened priority of particular things. I, at the same time, see another picture of the world as being empty--without homes, money, and all material things. In this world, all humans exist together merely as that...humans. In this world, there is still evil and good. Evil being one going against what they feel in their heart, and good being one acting on what they truly feel in their heart. Both evil and good based on feeling and action. Evil: judgement, abandonment, causing another pain in some way. (all going against what that person feels in their heart) Good: trying to understand both people and truth, seeing the good in others, humility. (all acting on what they feel in their heart.) Now when you take that picture of the world and incorporate reality into it, evil and good in the same sense can still be seen. However, there is much added, and the evil is not necessarily a person acting on something they in their heart know is not good and true, but the original thought that has been ingrained into their mind which has made them naively believe this thing to be good and true. Though they could feel in their heart these things to not be good and along the lines of truth, there would be confusion, due to what the natural man has convinced society to believe as good and true. something priority, but rather, the original thought that was passed on and prioritized.

Obviously, both good and evil exist. I also have a firm knowledge in the existence of God. My knowledge of his existence is something I cannot deny and is not something I was simply taught to believe. My knowledge has come from experience, question, and acting on faith. I know God to be omnipotent, absolutely and perfectly loving, and as allowing there to be evil in the world for our growth. This is something that does not need a precisely logical solution, as most people know. And I see our lack of knowledge about the details as a beautiful thing, for if we knew all of God's "mysteries" we would not need this life experience at all.

2009-01-06T19:29:00.000-08:00

Gotta love trash! Or symmetry.

2008-12-25T23:40:00.000-08:00

Christmas 2008!

was AWESOME!!! One that will be very memorable. My mom and I shared the kitchen on Christmas Eve. She made her greek olive dish and sweet bread, and I made various Christmas treats along with a vegan dish. We watched It's a Wonderful Life as we always do, while drinking hot chocolate and sitting by the fire.

Then X-mas morning came too fast. I awoke to the boys singing Christmas songs really really loudly and dragged myself out of bed. We did our typical Christmas lineup--youngest to oldest--for our big presents. (I got a new camera, mish got a basketball book and something else, rob got books and a game for his Wii. We all got guitar hero "world tour" to share, which rocks!) Then we opened more presents, went to the Lifferth's for breakfast, dropped by Grandpa Young's place, and spent time/had dinner at Grandma and Grandpa Blair's house family. Ok. Basically just forced myself to write about Christmas in detail for memory's sake, so there you have it. Ha!

News that sucks: Kaila and her fam are moving to Indiana next week and we're all sad about it.

2008-12-16T14:40:00.000-08:00

Christmas is Coming!

Below are a couple photos part of the fam took on Saturday. The first one is in front of our family's tree in my parents' living room, and the second is of my mom and niece Gabby in front of the tree Louis Duffy sent my mom. And Gabby is holding Queen Frostine from Candyland in each picture, which hopefully will excite you about the winter-time. :]

2008-12-13T12:56:00.000-08:00

Why oh why do they time the A.C.T. so ridiculously?? I could have done so much better on that stupid test. Who knew intelligence worked according to the speed of your thoughts? Hm... well, have some art:

2008-12-03T11:51:00.001-08:00

Alright, no stealing my writing or I will hunt you down (no, really, I will.) But I'm going to put some more in my blog since I write so much on an almost-daily basis. I usually write in weird shapes--unstructured--so I'll organize it here, though it won't be perfect.

Circular entities anticipate spring
Fall still so beautiful
We sit in peace

Castles on hills
At the time all is still
Colors sublime
As our eyes gaze

What is eternity, they ask again
Will we know before
or will our guesses be too late

No thought as to when or why or how
Just live in love and all will be shown
In the moments that come

Surprised with such deep feelings unknown
The bliss that comes, the peace

Anywhere in the world, he stands, she stands. Vision shared. To the iris a display, to the mind a film individually made. Perceptions skewed, focus disarrayed, one side of the world to the other, endless contradiction, not to mention the ingrained hate. Intelligent these lies, enough to be seen as truth. Nauseating as it is, magnified the unseen shame. You believe what because why? Surroundings you've been put in, time taken away, time they could be using to think. To form opinions, decisions, ideas, a new world. Contradictions every angle, time too focused on, so it leaves apbruptly. And we watch this, a maddening continuation.

Shafting sounds of light so loud
The aria vaguely changes tunes
Alternating staggered prodigy
Tears the acrylic away

Laid flat for the world's decryption
While the obvious argued with each witness
Lucidness ignites into fog
Abysmal confusion oppugned

Most succumb void of petition
Wonder lost so juvenilely
Your authenticity affirmed
If only you'd give thought to ask

Empyreal eternity
No fear belongs in the substance
Your sanction individual
Leave discursive anxiousness alone

Undertake the unfeigned longing
Though it may feel rugged at first
Unbridle every ounce of trust
The apocalypse is landing

Sweetness saturates all senses
Never again dubiety
The resonating clouds unmoved
As the consummation goes on

2008-11-19T17:02:00.000-08:00

Sanctuary

YAY! The studio (slash temporary residence) is coming along now that I've had some time to work on it. I must say, I'm quite proud of myself for putting the light fixture up all by myself, wiring and everything :] I love putting things together, and the accomplished feeling you get from it, especially when you do something for the first time. The room has some chill vibes in it now, which allows for inspiration and a place to relax, as well as a place to work hard. Still a lot I want to do when I have the means, but I'm pleased with it for now.

2008-11-19T16:56:00.000-08:00

Qual Quelle

..would be the title of the first track w/ vocals up on Afterlife Complex's page:

www.myspace.com/afterlifecomplex

There's a taste of what is to come.

2008-11-09T15:21:00.000-08:00

Inspiration; Let it Stir Something.

For the past hour I've been doing some reading and writing. The first half spent reading a book by author Ellen Hopkins, whom I share a similar style of writing with. I enjoy reading her books because of the inspiration they provide (along with interest in understanding the subjects she deals with) and find that my own writing flows better after reading her material. The second half of my hour has been dedicated to writing, though not previously intended. Seldom do I plan my writing time or subjects to write on. I can’t determine how particular events are going to make me feel or what thoughts will be provoked in me until its reality is experienced and perceived by me. While reading words on a page that were written by a stranger, I didn’t expect to think about current situations in my life and how they make me feel in relation to what I was reading, but that’s how the two pages I wrote were inspired, and is often how inspiration works.

Before I continue, let me explain the reason behind me writing this blog:

A while back, an acquaintance from high school wrote something on her facebook status that left me feeling bugged. It was long enough ago that I don’t remember who it was or the actual wording of her statement—not that she holds it close to her heart or anything—but my feelings of annoyance have resurfaced several times since disagreeing with her words. Something along the lines of: "Inspiring quotes are just a way of feeling smart for the uninspired" (although it must have said something different for it to annoy me as much as it did.) What she said clearly indicated her belief that all people tend to or should be in a constant state of inspiration without having to read anything (etc.) to spark the inspiration. While it is possible to have creative thoughts without reading something, I believe people should take the time to be inspired, whether it be through written words, time spent in nature, or the studying of artwork. I could contradict this person’s statement in saying that those who find inspiring quotes to be made for the “stupid and uninspired” most likely don’t have a passion of their own and probably don’t make personal goals or care to grow as an individual.

Inspiration is derived from what a person has experienced and been surrounded with, what that person seeks in life, the beliefs that person has (and how easily they are swayed vs. how opinionated they are), and what that person is currently going through in life.

Allowing yourself to be inspired is one of the smartest things you could do, especially in American life, which has become so based on convenience. People are used to being stressed and are either wrapped up in work they don't enjoy, or sitting in front of a TV to de-stress before another day of work begins. Americans don’t spend enough time taking deep breaths and thinking for themselves. And then we’re left with a bunch of lost people with a skewed perception of reality who spend additional time getting more and more lost with “convenient” highs from drugs, alcohol, gambling, or sex. Less and less people spend time reading classic literature, listening to music that inspires (the majority of pop music today promotes sex or suicidal thoughts), and spending time appreciating art—much of which is right in front of our eyes.

While not all people enjoy reading quotes in their spare time for inspiration, almost all people have a hobby they enjoy taking part in. Beyond hobbies are passions--things people live for and can put their whole soul into. Though I have several, music is what I am most passionate about. Inspiration in music (and my passion for it, of course) is why my voice is where it is, although much could be done to improve it. Over the years I've listened to an array of music that has inspired me, whether consciously realized or not. Some artists inspired me in setting goals to reach certain notes, other artists inspired the subject of songs I would write, and some artists inspired me to challenge myself in various ways.

Inspiration works individually.

Being an individual means you get to decide what you like and what you don't like.

Being creative allows you to come up with something of your own based on your individual personality.

Being a creative individual means you will come across things that inspire you, which will influence the direction of your creativity, expand your openness to new and different things, and provide you with invigorated feelings.

So tell me, is it really a waste of time to read inspiring quotes to flicker a candle of thought? Is it really so stupid to seek personal growth and understanding?

Inspiration does many things. The writing I was inspired to produce today helped one feeling turn into another feeling. A situation in my book resembled the feeling of uncertainty in the main character. Her situation made me think of people in my life and current feelings. I began asking myself questions, some subconsciously, about why certain feelings were there. And aha! There I found myself with pen and paper writing lines based off emotion, feeling more invigorated with each one, as I was able to see things more clearly. Not only did I achieve personal understanding, but was able to put reasoning to my feelings, which aided in giving perspective and peace to current and future reality.

Maybe not all people seek to understand themselves or the world in depth, but that doesn’t mean a person is incapable of being inspired. Sometimes inspiration comes naturally, sometimes you have to seek it out, but what is most important is that you allow inspiration to occur, and let it happen often.

2008-11-03T20:59:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I'm in a blogging mood, but I kind of am.
So I guess I'll update a bit.

Those who check my blog probably already know that I've been in Chicago this past week. If you don't know why I was there, I was recording vocals for music that will be released for your ears to hear sometime this month. Be sure to check out www.myspace.com/afterlifecomplex for further updates. (Pictures below are of Ryan, the guy I was staying with, hopefully he doesn't mind me sticking them in my blog)

I should also mention that I got to spend a couple days with my mom in Chicago. My mom met Ryan her first night there and apparently wishes she could adopt him. Haha. She was there for her documentary "Nobody Knows" (correct title?) so I decided to extend my stay. She had various conferences to attend, but we managed to check out the Art Institute, which was a lovely experience. I had hoped to find more pieces that really captivated me, and with more time there I probably would have. However, I did discover something about myself and how I view art.

When people stand in awe of a painting that conveys no real emotion or passion I become confused. How do their eyes work when viewing the piece? What connection are they making? Is it the colors, the way the artist stroked his brush on the canvas, the shapes, the event, the history of the painting? As far as the history is concerned, I am absolutely intrigued by it. But in order for me to be drawn to a piece of artwork, I have to make a connection, and I have to sense some sort of passion. There is the artist who paints a girl standing in a field, and then there is the artist who paints a girl who is not just standing in a field but who is passionately concerned about something beyond that field. Even colors alone can convey passion. I am also drawn to symmetry, but there has to be something more to its simplicity for me to take it in. I making sense? Sense. That is what I like.. to sense realness.. real feeling or real question.. I like to sense pure originality that conveys individuality.

Anyway, I got back in Utah last night. Had some inconvenient things happen with my work situation and am on the lookout for something new. I was feeling artistic this morning and made a completely new resume, now all I have to do is find someone who will be impressed. I hate that, how in the work-world you can't always just "be" but have to go out of your way to impress. And I don't mean impressing someone by being professional, but the fakeness is what bothers me. When someone is one person in setting A (work) and a completely different person in setting B (home). It's just funny how people view strangers so differently depending on how they meet them. I'm thinking of particular situations, so this thought won't come out clearly unless I continue explaining, which I'm in no mood to do. My blogging mood is suddenly something of the past, because I'd rather write with pen and paper in a more poetic form than continuing to write sentences.

2008-11-01T21:25:00.000-07:00

Beautiful Symmetry.

I have been falling in love with Chicago this past week.

Took those with my cell phone, will write more on this and upload better photos next week. Love you all!

2008-10-07T21:55:00.000-07:00

Tori, you rock.

Piano comes in @ 2:27. So much emotion evoked, phenomenal live recording from '96. Song is "Caught a Little Sneeze."

2008-10-06T08:44:00.000-07:00

Autumn

Utah, your scenery is getting old since I stare at it through the windows at work day after day. However, I do have to tell you.. you are absolutely beautiful in the magnificent month of October! (And September, although October is my favorite.)

A friend of mine took that photo. Astonishing.

I did some photography up the Provo Canyon a couple weeks back, but my camera just does not leave me satisfied with my photos. By the way, if you are a fan of art, I recommend checking out www.deviantart.com where you can post your own work and/or view others.

If you are in Utah for this season, soak it in!! It does not get any better than this! I don't think anybody can compare to Utah's Autumn scenery and chilly weather that is more cozy than anything.

2008-10-01T16:12:00.000-07:00

Music . . . what would I do without you . . .

such a good question.

2008-09-11T13:27:00.000-07:00

Red: End of Silence

My CD of choice to play in my car yesterday was Red's "End of Silence." Absolutely love it. I've read a couple of reviews on this album, both of which the writer had mostly neutral-negative things to say. I, however, identify with deep thinkers, especially musicians and artists who are deep thinkers. Deep thinkers also tend to be deep "feelers" and connect emotions to things. While talking to a friend of mine last night, I told him that one reason I write lyrics and make art is because it is the naturally easy way for me to explain the way I see, feel, or think about things. We joked about how funny it'd be if I were to talk metaphorically to people, which is often how I write lyrics.

Listening to End of Silence was a piercing experience. The instrumentals are phenomenal and the messages conveyed are beautiful. I love feeling relatable to music, and I feel that way with Red. They are one of the bands I'd love to work with. I've noticed in rock music that people bear testimony of their beliefs a lot, which I sometimes do in my music. It has to be an artist thing, the need to understand things deeply and the feeling of unsettledness until what you want to understand clicks. Or even if something doesn't click, that you can see it in a new light and rid the unsettled feeling. With Red's album, I can make sense of the music. The lyrics, the vocals, and the instrumentals together provide a beautiful picture for me and allow me to think--in a way that feels natural. Some music inspires me and/or I grow to like it over time but never feel relatable to it, whereas Red's album lets my artistic-ness just.. flow.

Also, End of Silence is one of the albums that needs to be played at higher volume to get the full effect. The style is rock, though instruments used include piano and violin (which I love love love in rock music, Misha knows that the effect "pierces my soul!" ha) and for that effect, quality listening makes for quality sound.

By the way, I've been writing about two songs per day this past while, I'll have to do a post including lyrics of mine sometime. If my dad would leave his laptop out for me to freely record on, you could hear samples of my latest work. (Yeah.. that'd be nice dad.. how about we switch computers.. ha vista sucks!)

2008-09-02T15:59:00.000-07:00

Sputnikmusic

As a musician, I love being inspired by all sorts of artists. I'm also just a music fanatic who relates to other musicians. I came across the website: http://www.sputnikmusic.com/ which is awesome! They have well-written reviews of different albums and information about various artists, which I'm super interested in. I love the feeling of education (when I'm interested in the content) and reading reviews on this site is quite the educating experience. I usually wouldn't have so much time to spend on a site like this, but since I am sick with bronchitis, it has been the perfect activity. I've been reading reviews, listening to the reviewed music myself, coming up with my own opinions, and then writing notes in a music (education & history) notebook of mine. If you are a music fanatic, I'd recommend it. Some of their forums and other entities are a bit iffy, but as long as you focus on reviews of music, you will fully enjoy what they have to offer.

2008-08-31T22:35:00.000-07:00

My ART: is really not fashion.

But rather what is contained inside of me and how I convey that to others.

Music is my art, photography is my art, poetry is my art, dance is my art, film is my art. The way my eye and brain work together creates art every single day. I see color, shapes, angles, space. My art is the life I live.

We are the canvas: laughter, love, pain, joy, comfort, fear, culture, experience, adventure, knowledge. Our existence itself is art.

And I'm telling you, it's beautiful.

By the way, that is a photograph of an automatic door mechanism. I didn't take it, but I think it looks sweet.

2008-08-19T20:38:00.000-07:00

August 19th 2008 Update . . .

First off, I will start by saying that I am so excited for my sister Kaila tomorrow! She is being induced in the morning.. oh wait.. sorry Kaila, should I be excited for all that pain you get to go through? I am excited for little Oliver to finally come out and that you will not be pregnated any longer, since he has given you so much joy the past 9 months..

So, also, new job! I'd tell you what it is, but you'd probably not consider me very intelligent after hearing where I work now. I went to high school with the manager, she is such an awesome girl. And finally I work there, because it's honestly so so convenient, and the employees are all really down to earth--not what you'd expect for that kind of place. As for what kind of place it is, let's just say people come in whiter than when they leave. Figured it out?

Lastly, I am no longer living at Carriage Cove apartments. My check-out was this morning, and I wish I would've signed a year contract, because now I'm in desperate need for an apartment and am having no luck. Thankfully my parents live in town so I can stay with them until I find a place.

Life is a beautiful thing, I'm so grateful to have a beating heart and pumping lungs. And everything I have. Heard the news about the Clark's/Nelson's and although I never knew them my heart aches for what they're going through. I can't even imagine.

Alright, I'm off to bed. Hope you all are doing well!

Update: Kaila had her baby boy on the 20th (9lbs 5 oz!) My brother and I snapped quick shots with my cell-phone, he is so so cute.

2008-08-06T19:18:00.000-07:00

Provo's Stereotype = True.

And I do not fit in at all. Almost every person I know is either married, engaged, or on the lookout for a husband. Some of my friends even have kids already. I must admit, a year ago I was considering marriage as a soon-to-be possibility. And if I met and was with the right guy now, marriage would be on my mind a bit more. But honestly, this is madness!

This subject always gets me thinking. I actually am excited to get married and have a family, but don't feel the need to jump on that wagon anytime soon. Like I said: right guy, right time, no problem. I won't write too too many thoughts on this subject, because my opinions are not true for everyone, and I wouldn't want to make anyone feel like I am judging them for getting married so young. The past year for me, though, has been an eye opener for me, and I've been able to more fully come into my own. If I had married the guy I expected to a year ago, I would have been able to work through it, but in order for me to be myself I would have been sacrificing a lot. I don't think I would have felt supported in my views and decisions, and I would have felt the need to be very traditional due to his expectations. I just hope nobody tries to convince themselves that something is there that in the long-run would limit both people from being all they could be. Though I do want to say that I have so much faith in all of my friends' recent marriages and couldn't be happier for them!

As for me, here is where I am a bit stuck . . .

I don't know if I should be more focused on marriage than I am, or ok, not marriage, but relationships. I do not need a boyfriend to be happy, and while that is a good thing, I'm also so independent and hardworking that I miss opportunities in the dating world. Time spent on my music or various projects is time that other girls would be spending with their boyfriends. And while I'd make a great wife, I don't know that I'd make a great girlfriend right now. (If that makes sense.) Maybe I tend to meet the wrong guys, it seems as though they are either super straight-edge on one side of the page or the other, and I feel like I'm in the middle of the extremes with a circle around the entire book. I can see this visual in my mind and know what I'm talking about and would be able to explain it with a picture more easily. Typing out this picture in words would just waste space.

Anyway, hardly anyone in Provo and Nevada (that I've dated) seems real when it comes to dating. They seem to ask questions as if it is an "Are you future wife material?" survey that I'm filling out. No joke. And then we have our men that think their money will impress, no no no.. biggest turn off. I like to learn about a guy by spending time with him and seeing how he handles real life situations. If I am with a guy, I care about him, and am focused on how I feel when I am with him. And more than anything, I would want it to feel real.

I am perfectly fine keeping my focus on music and school, but don't want to miss opportunities with men because of my passion. Yet I don't want to miss opportunities in music because of a man. I won't just get in a relationship to be in one, that's the lamest thing to me. So when I am in a relationship, the guy means a whole lot to me, and at this age--could lead to marriage. (I promise I won't rush into it, whatever the situation.)

Should I be more focused on meeting guys? Keep all my focus on music and education? Or just keep things how they are and see who I happen to meet along the way? I know I'm young and don't need to worry about it, but suggestions are still helpful.

2008-07-27T16:00:00.000-07:00

I'm stealing this from Johanna.

THREE JOYS:
1. Family
2. Music
3. Laughter

THREE FEARS:
1. Losing anyone that is close to me
2. Being crushed by a big car while walking past it in the parking lot. It's more a superstition, but my heart starts beating faster and I pick up the pace when, say, there is a wall to my left, me walking, and a huge truck (parked) to my right. Weird, I know. I picture the event taking place every time.
3. Having to watch someone I love suffer and die & not being able to save them (ex: drowning, torture, seizure, car crash, etc.)

THREE SHORT TERM GOALS:
1. Finish vocals and lyrics for the band I'm working with
2. Register for classes at UVU
3. Get another 2nd job (my last one "let go" all the new people)

THREE CURRENT OBSESSIONS:
1. Music
2. Ben Stiller & Jerry Stiller (so hilarious)
3. photography

THREE SURPRISING FACTS:
1. Many things in school (math or one-way thinking) are difficult for me, I am too creative & artistic. That's prob not surprising, though.
2. I think America is full of idiotic beliefs and systems, based way too much around money
3. My mind's complexity annoys me, I dig too deeply into things. For instance, when I watch a commercial, I never think "I want that", but rather think about the tactics being used to make people want to buy the product. Or in scary movies, I can't get scared, because I'm thinking about everything being done to make it scary. At the same time, it's nice, because my beliefs are real. Though life would be easier if I were a lot more "basic" of a person.

2008-06-16T06:24:00.000-07:00

A Reckless Father's Day

I've been staying at my parent's house while they're in San Fransisco, and Misha and I have had some pretty exciting adventures! Mish now has his learner's permit (craziness!) so I've been taking him out driving everyday to get him more comfortable behind the wheel. The funniest thing has been his nose-touching. HA! Apparently in simulators his nervous habit was to touch his nose, so on the road he does the same thing. Makes me laugh so hard.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, DAD!
(we made a weird vegan cake, since we felt like we should celebrate the day, even though our dad wasn't here. And yes, I know you don't bake cakes in tin foil, it's all my parents have, haha.)

2008-05-26T01:05:00.000-07:00

At the Top of My List...

I am a music fanatic, and find different things about various artists appealing, but have had trouble coming up with just a few favorites. However, the following artists are definitely at the top of my list. I have listened to these artists since I was in elementary school and was introduced to Live and Tori Amos by my sister. I've actually been learning some of Live's songs on guitar and can't get enough of it!

Favorite songs from Live:
1. Lakini's Juice
2. I Alone
3. All Over You
4. Lightning Crashes
5. Selling the Drama

Favorite songs from Tori Amos:
1. Crucify
2. Silent All These Years
3. Bouncing off of Clouds
4. Raspberry Swirl
5. Girl

2008-05-16T01:16:00.000-07:00

Vegan Banana Bread

Since there are so many foods my body won't tolerate, much of what I make is vegan, so that I can eat it. This is my own version of a recipe I found on http://www.vegweb.com/ and it was delicious! I love bread when it's moist, and this was perfect. Also, I did take a picture of my bread, but might have deleted it by accident. Oh, and my roommate who tried this bread loved it and couldn't tell a difference between this version and regular banana bread.

3 medium bananas (very ripe)
1/3 cup unsweetened applesauce
1 tbsp stevia powder
2/3 cup splenda
2 tsp olive oil
1.5 tsp miracle whip
¼ cup vanilla soy milk
1 ½ tsp vanilla

1 2/3 cup whole wheat flour
1 tsp baking soda
¼ tsp baking powder
½ tsp salt
about ½-1tbsp cinnamon (few shakes)

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees and spray a 9 inch square pan with non-stick cooking spray. If using a standard loaf pan, increase heat to 350.
2. In a large mixing bowl, mix together first five ingredients until well incorporated.
3. In a medium bowl, mix the remaining ingredients.
4. Dump flour mixture into the wet and stir just until uniformly moist. DO NOT OVERMIX! Depending on the type of flour you use, you may need to add a little extra water or soymilk to reach the right consistency. The dough should be somewhere in between pancake batter and cookie dough.
5. Dump into prepared pan and give it a couple shakes to distribute the batter.
6. Place on the middle oven rack and bake uncovered for 30-40 minutes. (If using a standard loaf pan, increase baking time.) Check the bread at around 30 minutes. It is done when just starting to brown around the edges and still a little moist looking in the middle. Allow to cool ten minutes before cutting into squares or slices.
Serves: 12 Preparation time: 45 minutes

2008-05-16T00:57:00.000-07:00

Update..ish

I'm not doing the best job at updating my blog, but I think I'll give a brief summary of recent events.

I've moved into Carriage Cove Apartments, which has been great. Cute apartment, cool roommates, and get to meet new people. Photos soon, promise.

Still working at the hotel while looking for a second job. I've applied to be a personal trainer at 24-Hour Fitness, and have filled out applications for Good Earth as well.

I chopped my hair and absolutely love it! I'll post a photo sometime.

Have had to deal with a couple of irritating situations regarding men, but we'll avoid those topics.
Haven't been taking some of my meds for my health condition and have been feeling so good and normal! Not sure if I've said anything about that, but it's a hassle. We'll see what my doc has to say about it all..

Have cooked up quite a bit of food the past while, and I must say I'm getting pretty good. (every other time.)
A couple of pretty good friends came home from their missions, neither of which I would date, but it's fun to have them back.

Alright, that's all I will fill you in on. Not much explanation of the details, but hey, at least I made the effort to jot down something.

On a more random note, check out this picture, hah love it:

2008-04-22T17:15:00.000-07:00

Life is Beautiful.

That is all I have to say today.

2008-04-15T23:46:00.000-07:00

I Love my Niece

Yes, it is true. Today we painted our nails and then wrote some awesome stories. Gabby also wrote a couple of poems.. sort of. She is a fast thinker! Her first "poem" went like this: "I went to the zoo and I saw my aunt, I just love my aunt, so I went to say hi!" Very talented, I must say. The following photos are from 2007.

2008-04-13T10:19:00.001-07:00

More from California, 2007

2008-04-13T09:40:00.000-07:00

More from Guatemala, 2006

Since I don't have many pictures on my blog and people want to see more, I am going to post photos of various events from the past couple years. Here are some from our stay in Guatemala. I have more on CD that I need to upload to my computer, but here are a few that I do have:

1.) Teaching the 1st grade 2.) Some adorable first graders 3.) Some first graders that were also in our ward 4.) Teaching the first grade a dance 5.) Our living room 6.) Where they keep lots of trash.. eek 7.) Mish eating fried platanos [bananas] which he didn't like so much 8.) Mish at Burger King in Quetzaltenango.

2008-04-07T06:23:00.000-07:00

Nutritional Tip of the Day: Kiwis

"Kiwifruit is a rich source of vitamin C, 1.5 times the DRI scale in the US. Its potassium content by weight is slightly less than that of a banana. It also contains vitamins A and E. The skin is a good source of flavanoid antioxidants. The kiwifruit seed oil contains on average 62% alpha-linolenic acid, an omega-3 fatty acid. Usually a medium size kiwifruit contains about 46 kilocalories, 0.3-gram fats, 1 gm proteins, 11 gm carbohydrates, 75 mg vitamins and 2.6 grams dietary fiber."

Kiwis, a superfood, are delicious and filled with nutrients. The skin of the kiwi fruit helps clean your lungs and improve your breathing, while the fruit inside contains 95% of the recommended daily value of Vitamin C. Having some breathing problems myself, namely bronchitis and walking pneumonia, which I get time and time again, I notice a drastic difference after eating just one kiwi fruit. I feel cleared up, rejuvenated, and healthy. Some people are allergic to latex-fruits, which include the kiwi fruit, avocados, and bananas. Strangely, I have an allergic reaction to bananas, but not kiwi fruit or avocados. If you know that you can tolerate kiwis, don't take it for granted and eat up!

"Enjoying just a couple of kiwifruit each day may significantly lower your risk for blood clots and reduce the amount of fats (triglycerides) in your blood, therefore helping to protect cardiovascular health. Unlike aspirin, which also helps to reduce blood clotting but has side effects such as inflammation and bleeding in the intestinal tract, the effects of regular kiwi consumption are all beneficial. Kiwifruit is an excellent source of vitamin C, and polyphenols, and a good source of vitamin E, magnesium, potassium, and copper, all of which may function individually or in concert to protect the blood vessels and heart. In one study, human volunteers who ate 2 to 3 kiwifruit per day for 28 days reduced their platelet aggregation response (potential for blood clot formation) by 18% compared to controls eating no kiwi. In addition, kiwi eaters' triglycerides (blood fats) dropped by 15% compared to controls." -World's Healthiest Foods

One Medium Kiwi Fruit

Calories: 46

fiber: 2.3g

calcium: 25.8mg

potassium: 237.1mg

Average cost of medium kiwi: $0.70

I recommend eating one kiwi fruit per day at most, or one kiwi fruit per week at least.

2008-03-03T14:52:00.000-08:00

My 2008 Goal-Book.

I am all about setting goals and making progress, whether it be in education, personal hobbies and interests, spirituality, or how I want to change the world. The book I have started has helped me immensely! There are several areas which I have set goals in: dance, music, relationships & dating, spirituality, etc. And I have created pages for each category, as well as a system of when to work on what goal, and how to track my progress. Also, I have included many artistic pages that I have designed, filled with inspiring quotes and beautiful art.

2008-03-03T14:42:00.000-08:00

The Latest Happenings in my Life...

As of November of 2007, I have been back in Utah, and though traveling around is one of my great loves in life, Utah is home. I love it here. I decided against transferring to the 24-Hour Fitness here, and have opted for something else. I am working at Hampton Inn (hotel) as a houseman, and hopefully soon-to-be front desk receptionist as well. This job is very different from other jobs I've had, in terms of the atmosphere and energy of the job. I'm used to such high demanding, high energy jobs, and this is one that varies depending on the day, but always requires my creativity to make the day fun rather than a drag.

Also, April is right around the corner, and I am going to start a couple of classes, in addition to the two I am currently taking. I can't wait! Learning is what I live for. I also miss being in a place where I can meet new people and have more of a social life, that will be fun, as will dating ;)

This year has started out extremely well, and will only get better!

2007-12-13T10:33:00.000-08:00

Jules Music on Myspace:
http://www.myspace.com/julesequalslove

2007-09-02T14:41:00.000-07:00

Those Who Have Had Influence on Me

Why am I the way I am?

A lot of "me" has to do with the experiences I've had, though I feel as though "me" is too natural of a thing, almost as if I've been this person for all of existence, yet as I think about my life and who has played a part in it thus far, I am amazed to see how I really have been influenced by so many people.

Why is it that I love to write, and why is it that others even find talent in my writing? Why do I have such a passion for music and for dance? Why was I writing plays and putting on my own yard sales in the third grade? Why do I have such a tremendous love for people all around the world and for languages?

Writing . . .

As a kindergartener, and even a pre-schooler, I had a real love for reading and writing. I'm sure my parents influenced me in this regard by giving me books to read and Shakespearean poems to memorize at age three, but I always felt a sense of joy when I would read or write. I think much of my joy came from the fact that I would always learn something new and improve my own abilities. I vividly remember sitting on my bed as either a three or four year old and reading Dr. Suess, being so excited that I could read the words. In school, I would write silly stories, usually about things that made me happy: princesses, butterflies, beautiful things in the world, my family, my friends. I had a real love for learning. I remember looking at the board, sitting in Mrs. Ord’s first grade class and loving the fact that we were learning new words. I challenged myself, I always wanted harder words.

While my family and I were in Europe, we spent time in the Baltics with my grandparents, who were serving a mission there. It was there that my grandma gave me my first journal, which started a whole journey of journal writing. I owe a lot of thanks to my grandma, because without that first journal, I don’t know if I would even own one today. But because of her gift, I have kept and finished approximately thirteen journals, and am now ready to start another one.

The following is my first poem (recorded anyway) written in Europe, at the age of 7. I wrote these a few places in my first journal and called them "Mystery Time." I'm not going to correct the places where I mis-spelt words, because it makes it that much better to have the errors:

Mystery Time (June, 1997)

Today is the time,
Oh please do a crimb.
Never ending stories on the moon,
Telling that it says its noon.
Telling my heart with joy,
Singing with that one (came up with 5 words & crossed them all out)
Never going to bed,
I should have been led.
The mystery is still going,
Shatering on the ground,
Never in heart burst with lafter,
Fillin it up today.
I am the crimb,
You can tell the time,
When we hear softly,
With truth never ending,
So high to do nothing is here so much.

Wow, such a talented poet.. (ha ha ha!)

My parents have continuously helped me to improve as a writer by critiquing my writing with honesty and letting me know where my trouble areas are, which has helped me get in the habit of knowing what mistakes I often make and how to correct them. Their critiquing became more detailed when I entered middle school, which came from them knowing my teachers might be more strict, but also came from my asking them to be as harsh and detailed as possible, so that I could become as good of a writer as I could. They have taught me most of what I know, and I feel blessed to have them, because no middle school or high school teacher of mine has ever covered nearly enough in any subject, but especially writing. My passion for wanting to express what I feel in writing has given me the drive to make multiple revisions of papers, yet no matter how many revisions I felt like making, they would always be willing to look at my work and discuss things with me as well as mark up the pages. They have helped me more than any teacher has, and continue to do so.

Music . . .

I was always embarrassed by my mom’s loud singing when we were in public (such as sacrament meeting) but I have become grateful for it, because I was raised with the knowledge that music is important and beautiful. My mind was enlightened as I learned about great composers as well as great rock artists.

I was given opportunities to learn how to play instruments, and though I quit almost every time, it helped me to discover my abilities, as well as what I wanted to pursue.

My mom’s example of being productive (having projects, such as writing books and giving speeches) had an influence on me, although I’ve only recently come to realize it. I started writing lyrics at the age of seven, and at the same time had a “pop” band with my friends. (I was also caught up in designing my room, writing plays, planning my life, creating art out of vegetables that I’d sell with my friends at school, doing hair and makeup, going on adventurous bike rides, etc..)

My mom had me take voice lessons from Dot Todman, because she had finally heard me bust out my pipes (something I had been too shy to do before, I didn’t know she was home when I was singing either. The song was “A Child’s Prayer” which I turned into a pop-radio style song for fun.) Taking voice helped me in many ways, even though it was for a short period of time. I had to loosen up and learn to be myself on stage/not be so shy, I learned that I had more musical capability than I thought, and I learned that I really did have a huge passion for music, for singing in particular.

Dance . . .

Before Lindsey Clark's show had its impact on me, I had the experiences of dancing hula in Hawaii, dancing/singing with Sunshine Generation, and taking clogging (even though I quit after someone made a rude comment to me)

Lindsey Clark had huge influence on me when I saw her show at PHS of her students that were on dance company. I was amazed by it all and went home that night with dreams of being a dancer just like that. I never lost that ambition or drive for dance and still remember how I felt that night. I have always been someone who has a lot inside of me that I wish to share with the world, and dance is something so expressive, which is why I love it so much. I’m an expressive person and have so much to express. Lindsey was a role model for me, though I didn’t know her for very long, nor did I get close with her (I was very young) but she had a huge impact on me and my dancing.

Languages and a love for people all over the world . . .

I feel so blessed that I have been lucky enough to see so much of the world. Traveling has been a natural thing for me all my life, since my family has been traveling since my birth. Naturally, I have learned to respect people from all nationalities and religious beliefs.

In London, I remember this girl who was Catholic--she was one of the maid's daughters. I really liked her, and I wondered how I could like someone so much who wasn't Mormon, like me. I thought she would maybe be rude to me since I wasn't Catholic, but I thought she was beautiful and nice. I didn't care that we had differences. (I was seven when I met her.)

My Grandpa Blair was/is a linguist. Just by watching him speak in other tongues, I have learned to love languages, people, and diversity, because I have seen in him a love so brightly lit when I hear him speak.

My mom has always had association with all different people. While she taught Spanish institute, students of hers would often come to our house, and she would speak to them in Spanish about problems they were facing or questions they had. I always thought to myself how beautiful my mom was for reaching out to people like that, and I always wished I could speak in other languages so I could talk to more people the way she could. I always had such admiration for my mom as I would listen to the beautiful language that I couldn't understand from another room. My mom has also had a lot of association with Genesis members, which include many ethnicities, with the majority being black (African American, but include people from the Carribean, as well as many other places.) Not only this, but she was good friends with Susie Thomas and the Thomas family. She taught me love and service by her example. I've never heard a racist comment in my home, and have instead learned the stories and struggles of faith that so many people have faced, which has taught me how to have faith in my own life.

My dad's Christ-like efforts have had a huge impact on me my whole life. I always felt so guilty that I wasn't as Christ-like as he was. For instance, in elementary school, I would be really mad at him for something and would be so frustrated that I would dig my fingernails into his skin out of anger, and he wouldn't say anything at all. He would sit there calmly, demonstrating Christ-like qualities, and teaching me that I would have to decide for myself if what I was doing was right or wrong. All throughout my life he has demonstrated these qualities to me, and has helped me to sit back and realize that I knew the right answers. There's an inner stability within me that has been strengthened by his example.

2007-07-05T15:49:00.001-07:00

My House in Nevada!

For more photos of my house, visit my flickr page: http://www.flickr.com/photos/9490764@N04/

2007-07-05T12:27:00.000-07:00

San Diego, California Trip

above: Misha body-surfing, below: beautiful ocean

Two photos above: Misha at La Jolla Beach, looking calm and relaxed
Two photos below: left- ocean, right- Steve Egburt & my dad (both college friends) at La Jolla

2007-06-16T10:39:00.000-07:00

My Parents Left me in Vegas

Can you believe that? We go to California and Mexico, then stop in Las Vegas, and what do they do? They leave me here all alone with nothing but my suitcase. Would your parents ever do that to you? I don't think so. But how could two wonderful, brilliant, and loving people just leave their daughter in another state all by herself?

Alright, I'll admit it, it's my fault. You see, I have this black heritage that no one knows about. Externally, I appear Swedish, right? But we all know that saying, "Don't judge a book by it's cover!" so that would be foolish to believe that just because I'm white I'm from Sweden. Ok, so maybe I am from Sweden, but blood and soul are not the same thing. We all know blood is purple on the inside and red on the outside, but does that make me purple-red? No, you see, my red-purple blood is what makes me white. Basically, my soul is that of a beautiful African, not a cow-milking Swedish girl. Maybe you're wondering why I wasn't dropped off in Africa or the Carribean or something. Out of all places for this externally-white, internally-black person to settle, why Nevada? I'll tell you why.

Ever seen Mission Impossible? Mission Impossible 2? Well, I too am on a mission. Only my mission is more like Mission Definitely-Possible. Alright, alright, I realize you're probably sick of all this confusion in my story. Let's rewind...

As my family and I were driving from San Diego to Las Vegas, we were aware that Gladys Knight would be holding open auditions for her Saints Unified Voices choir. The issue about whether or not I should audition had caused a bit of contention, and I figured I wouldn't be able to audition, which was completely fine with me at this point. The reason for the contention, however, was quite justifiable, because if made the choir, I would have to stay in Las Vegas to attend the first three mandatory rehearsals, but not only this--I would have to live within two hours of the choir. Only, I wouldn't have a car to drive, so I would have to find a place within 5 miles or so of the chapel. Sounds quite ridiculous, doesn't it? Trying out for a choir that changes every detail of your life? I'm sure you're wondering why one would even consider something like this.

Yet as we drove to Las Vegas, I warmed up my voice for the heck of it. I had this really good feeling about things in general, not knowing why or if I'd even audition for this choir. I knew, though, that if I were to make the choir and have to suddenly move--everything would be worked out perfectly. 6:39pm, we exited the freeway. I was already late for auditions, but somehow, it all felt ok, and everyone was ok with me auditioning. My mom didn't think I'd make the choir, because Sister Knight's open auditions had one main purpose--to increase the diversity of the choir. My mom didn't think my internally black self would show itself enough to Gladys, but as my family went to dinner while I stayed at the auditions, I got Gladys to feel what my soul felt, and my whole world changed.

Ending line of song: "Oh, bless me now, my Savior, I come to thee." (eyes closed, definitely feeling the music.)
Gladys: huge smile on her face
Julie: Even huger smile on her face, "My heart is like bu-buh, bu-buh"
(while using hand-actions to demonstrate the intensity of my heart beats.)
Gladys: Still smiling, she says, "Would you be able to make rehearsals?"
Julie: "yes" (with confidence.)
Gladys: "I'll see you Friday." (happily.)
Roshina (accompanist): "Congradulations"

And we all exchange big smiles.

I didn't expect to have my answer that fast. I couldn't even think about what this meant, I felt so happy and so good about everything, but it made no sense, and I was a bit worried about my parents reaction. Would they allow me to stay in Las Vegas?

mom: "You made the choir?!" (in shock.) . . . "I feel really good about it."

PHEW.

After a lot of chaos, confusion, disbelief, and panic-- everything started to work itself out. I know I'm supposed to be here, and I know there have been people who I can't visibly see who have been helping me out immensely. We found the perfect house, which I share with four other girls, and my missionary's family lives in Las Vegas & they have done so much for me. I have a laptop being shipped to me, I bought a car the other day, and I can actually handle 109 degree wheather. It's amazing. Though I'll have my car to drive on Tuesday, I have gotten to really enjoy walking all over the place, it's what has gotten me used to the super dry and super hot climate. (Though my feet aren't in the prettiest condition and I have yet to find a job.)

So I lied, my parents didn't want to leave me all alone in another state, but it's what they did, and I think we're all happy about everything.

I love having such an exciting and random life! What would life be without these kind of adventures?

2007-03-23T22:09:00.000-07:00

Caye Caulker Island, Belize

Take the time to view these full size, it's worth it. No enhancements were made to the photos.
[I'll add the other ones from Belize when I have time and access to them.]

2007-03-23T08:42:00.000-07:00

Guatemala Anyone?

The summer of 2006 holds wonderful memories for my family and me. My mom,
little brother Misha, and I spent just over a month in Guatemala, with my dad
joining us for the last week or two. We had the opportunity to teach English
at the Colegio Mesoamericana Patzicia, which I miss greatly. Other adventures
we took part in include mom locking herself in the ATM in Chimaltenango,
running barefoot through the heavy and freezing cold rain storm, riding the
nauseating bus to Momostenango (which almost killed us all,) getting my
makeupbag stolen (It was immitation Louis Vuitton, he must have figured it was
a wallet--hope I made him really mad!) We also left our mark at our house in
Patzicia with artwork on the walls, I performed a mini-concert for the colegio
students, and of course we can't forget the amazing missionary I met.
Guatemala became closer to me than I thought it would, and I had a difficult
time on our plane ride home, not sure if I wanted to go home quite yet.

I did some photography in Guatemala, trying to capture the aunthenticity of it.

Our Shower in Patzicia: (We got lucky here--warm water!!)

Typical Graveyard in Patzicia:

Part of the main street in Chimaltenango:

Catholic Celebration in Momostenango:

Below are photos taken in Comalapa:

2007-02-25T08:33:00.000-08:00

Make your Mess into Art

I spent hours and hours constructing a catapult that would launch a water balloon. In the process, I managed to make a huge mess, which was frustrating. However, instead of cleaning the table up right away, I decided to make art out of my mess. The result:

2006-11-06T13:55:00.000-08:00

Chanel for a Day

I love photography, and I love dressing up my niece Gabby!
Here I decked Gabby out in Chanel, having her pose all on her own.